Liberty Postings

Secretary Clinton and I may not be nodding our heads in agreement over health care policy or the role that the federal government should play in the education of a three-year-old, but I stand with her 100% in her belief that it takes a village to raise a child.

Last night at church, we discussed the idea that children need at least five positive relationships with adults who are not their parents in order to make a successful and confident transition into adulthood.  And, this determined figure of five is for the typical kid from the suburbs who, let’s be honest, already has some advantages in life.  When boys and girls come from more challenging circumstances, the number of adults needed to help them through adolescence more than doubles.  Our kids need role models, mentors, coaches . . . men and women who they can turn to when they simply do not want to talk to their parents or maybe when their parents aren’t even around.

We have become such an insulated society.  Because of technology, our connections with people are made largely through text messages and emails.  It has become a lot easier to forget the human side of the person at the other end of our communication.  We can get home from work (if we don’t already work from home), close our door, turn on the TV, and not even deal with the people around us.  But, what if we decided to take an interest in one another?  What if we realized that our lives improve when we make things better for others?

I have seen what happens when people decide to become invested in the lives of others.  I discovered “a village” for my kids when I became a single parent about a year ago.  My friends in the neighborhood, members of my church, and even Facebook friends who I haven’t seen in decades extended love and support to my kids.  I can’t even begin to share all of the ways that our entire family has been “loved on” (which is a phrase I never heard until I moved to the South . . . I like it!).  And, my experience over the past year has made me determined to help other struggling families whenever I possibly can.  It’s contagious!  Wouldn’t it be great if such a virus could catch hold on a massive scale?  This feeling is not something that can be gained through a government program.  Instead, it comes from those personal relationships in a community.  When a neighbor takes a moment to notice that the older gentlemen who lives by himself is having a bad day and he asks how he can help, that’s where positive change can start to grow.

And, are kids always better off in a two-parent home?  Can a more expanded network of caring friends and family members create a healthier environment in some instances?  I am the only adult in my home, but I already am making sure that my kids are surrounded by adults who care about them and will help guide them.  I’ve spoken with several men I trust and directly asked them to be a part of Ian’s life before he even reaches his first birthday.  In the apartment below me, two PRECIOUS little children live with a mom and dad who are constantly screaming at each other, smoke pot on the porch, and tell the kids to “get the f***” away” from them.  And, I know there are little boys and girls living in similar circumstances on every street in this country.  What can I do to help?  For now, I just play outside with those two kids, listen to them, and tell them how awesome I think they are as often as possible.

Maybe it sounds too “feel good fu-fu,” but to me this concept of community ties in with my adherence to limited government.  If we truly take an interest in one another and help lift one another up, I think our government might just find that it’s not needed so much after all.

Are there other adults who you intentionally place in the lives of your children?  What is the responsibility that each one of us should have simply because we are all members of the same society?